Once upon a time, Gerald threw his back out because of a sock. Yes, dear readers, a sock. It was a few years ago, and Gerald’s back had been out for about a week and it was starting to feel a little better, it was on the mend. And that’s when it happened. I have a habit of throwing the boys’ floor laden dirty clothes at the room door. They will then at least be one step closer to the hallway dirty clothes basket where I’d prefer my family actually place their dirty laundry. So on that fateful evening, my youngest had a stray dirty sock on his bedroom floor, and, following the aforementioned described practice, I tossed it towards the bedroom door. Gerald happened to be standing there, I’m sure telling our son goodnight, and he didn’t know what I had thrown. Apparently he was unaware of my dirty clothes tossing routine. <What? Gerald unaware??> Anyway, not knowing what was coming at him, he instinctively turned his body quickly and then it happened. The back was back out again.
Besides the argument that ensued (Why would you throw a sock at me? How did I know a sock could scare your back?), I couldn’t get it. I couldn’t begin to understand what it felt like to have your back give out. I’d never ever had a problem with my back and I figured since I had never put this part of my body through any undue stress <like lifting an engine block, Gerald?>, I never would. Well, that all changed about two weeks ago, when, for the very first time, I threw my back out. Oh my. Wow. That hurts. I had no idea, no clue. Constant, can’t walk, can’t move, can’t bend, can’t stand, dull ache, sharp pain.
All those times of being unsympathetic over someone else’s back pain is O-V-E-R. I must apologize <yes, Gerald, you read that right> to family, friends, acquaintances, and even strangers who have ever complained or even touched upon the subject of back pain. I am truly sorry for ever trivializing it. I never realized how debilitating back pain can be until I felt it for myself. I admit to sometimes rolling my eyes when Gerald claimed his back was out. And I didn’t realize how suddenly it can happen until I did it myself.
My back is doing much better now; it was noticeably better the next day, actually. Ibuprofen really is a miracle drug, isn’t it? So for now, I’ve put my workouts on hold–oh what a shame–and I’ve been very careful in every movement. I sure don’t want to throw my back out ever again. Damn this getting older.