I guess you could call this post Throwback Thursdayish. I wrote it several years ago after Gerald and I took our oldest son and some of his buddies to the skating rink in celebration of his turning the big ELEVEN. It was a Friday night. Yeah, I know, what were we thinking? But anyhoo, being at the rink gave me all kinds of junior high flashbacks. We got home and I was moved to write the following letter of apology to my parents:
Dearest Mother and Father,
I am writing to apologize. In the spirit of celebrating your grandson’s 11th year of life, Gerald and I took him and four of his friends to a roller rink tonight. I may need to explain no further, but let me say how shocking, how appalling, the 10 to 15 year old age group. We had the privilege to first hand witness what I am positive were newly learned flirting rituals, flashing light pacifiers (?), vending machine and groin shaking/kicking, obnoxious noises/smells, girls dressed like hoochie mamas, foul language, and good old fashioned rule breaking.
Surely I, your youngest offspring, never partook in such atrocities. Surely I rebuked such behavior when I was a skating rink junky. You would drop me and my bff of the moment off at Skate World every Saturday night. I can recall skating (not sure where we found the time), flirting, skin-tight jeans that required a coat hanger to zip (don’t remember how any of us girls actually went to the bathroom, I don’t think we did), cursing, and I’m pretty sure, other disgusting behaviors thankfully long forgotten.
So if by chance your daughter actually participated in ANY of this described adolescent ridiculousness, for this I am truly sorry. I’m not sure when I developed such a repulsion, but as you know, your daughter DID make it through those crazy years–due to strong parental guidance I have no doubt–and I believe matured to be a sound minded middle-aged mother of an adolescent.
I can only pray that at some point in your grandson’s future, when he has children of his own, he will make the same discovery and his parents will receive the same apology.
This apology letter also requires the inclusion of a “thank you.” Thank you. Thank you for your patience and perseverance. I couldn’t have done it without you, my dear parents!
KD (YOUR DAUGHTER WHO POSSIBLY PARTICIPATED IN OBNOXIOUS ADOLESCENT BEHAVIOR)